mainsqueeze's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- fwenfgt5uiom,! The Other Boy stayed over last night. This is scary stuff, man. I'm not used to it. How am I supposed to act? Am I supposed to tell people? Are we "dating"? Where do the quotation marks go in that sentence? One thing to be concerned about: I'm not sure if he understands how important it is to me that I remain abstinent. I'm not going to say that I have to be married before I have sex again, but meaningless sex is out of the question. I can't do that anymore. I'm done with that part of my life. Well, he'll have to understand. Yeah. And another thing- I'm really paranoid. Like, I doubt everybody, even Crystal and Matt sometimes. Entering a new relationship is always really difficult for me, because I'm constantly questioning motives and wondering whether or not what I'm hearing is that truth. It makes it tough to build anything lasting. I guess you could say that I've got "trust issues". (And again, quotation marks?) So I'm working on Independence Day. Probably better this way, since Matt and the Boys are going to be doing Jello shots all night. I'll be good and sober, at least. 3:07 p.m. - 2003-07-04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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