mainsqueeze's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- fountains of yr eyes Mom is coming home today. The angioplasty was successful, no other problems were detected, blah, blah. She tells me that her doctors say her heart is remarkably healthy. Bullshit, lady. She's just trying to make excuses so she can keep smoking. "Remarkably healthy" hearts do not suddenly malfunction in the Girls' Clothing section of WalMart. We've got to go around the whole house and hide all of the lighters and mathces and ashtrays. I was at the hospital with her last week, and I used the bathroom a few minutes after she did, and in spite of all the perfume she'd sprayed and the fact that the fan was on full-force, I smelled cigarette smoke. I took the lighter she had left sitting on the sink and stuck it in my pocket. I came out and shot her a filthy look, and she mouthed "Shut up." No one else in the room noticed anything. It's scary that my Mother's addiction may be stronger than her drive to live, to survive long enough to see Lise grow up, to meet my first child, to make it to fifty years old. The puppies have opened their eyes. If I just exist for the next ten minutes of this drive, that would be fine. Matt is in love with Conor Oberst. I think they'd make a lovely couple. 4:49 p.m. - 2003-11-25 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||