mainsqueeze's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- on and on and We are all dead and in deep shit with the universe. Karma has chased us down and is feeding it all back to back to us, all the bullshit and lies and all of the hurt we've doled out: WERE GETTING IT ALL BACK! I am sitting on the balcony smoking and listening to a song that shakes my marrow and singing along at the top of my lungs, pretending that these headphones don't allow me to know how loud I am. Foreign countries. I've been looking up plane ticket prices and currency exchange rates. Anywhere, I'll go anywhere. I need to be ripped out of my environment, forced to adjust to a life that won't take me as I am, as this life has made me. I dream of fucking complete strangers under streetlights. I dream of severing every fucking wire that ties me here, save one or two. AND YOU, YOU, THE ONLY ONE WHO READS THIS THING: Get better. Get well again, or at least as well as you ever were. I love you, you fucking dumbass. I still love you, goddamnit, much as I don't want to. I still want to be your everything, or at least your almost-everything. I want to win. I want to dance on their ashes. 6:57 p.m. - 2004-09-01 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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