mainsqueeze's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

jesus doesn't want me for a sunbeam

When I hear this song, I miss her so fucking much my stomach starts to hurt.

-"hand-pool" in Papa's basement;
-you singing me "Angie" by the Rolling Stones;
-you and Jason Thompson;
-you saying that we were "thick like co'nbread" even after you got skinny;
-everything. i miss everything and feel so completely sorry I didn't try harder when I could have.

your smile, the way you always stayed out of the crazy family fights, you spending ten minutes in the bathroom while we waited for you to take your turn when me, you, mom and grandma played 31, your awful singing...

i still know i didnt try as hard as I should have but i'm going to try to live enough for both of us. for what you could have been.

3:15 a.m. - 2006-05-16

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next