mainsqueeze's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I Will Swim to You

Jody told me last night that I need to be more wolf, less bunny. Apparently, there is a movie that uses that comparison... but dammit, I am a bunny. I don't want to hunt down other bunnies; I want to frolick and mate with them. I haven't decided if I am going to heed his advice yet or not. Maybe I can be wolfier in some areas while staying bunnyish in others.
The other day I had this sudden, strange fear of falling asleep-- I felt like if I slept, something terrible would happen and I would wake up in a new and miserable world. That fear persisted for three nights before my brain's desire to preserve itself kicked in and I passed out and slept for fourteen hours. This has happened off and on for the past ten months. I keep thinking about October 25th of last year and how it was so normal and boring and how the next morning, everything was different. I'm afraid to answer early morning phone calls. I just... don't want anybody I love to get hurt. I don't know why or when it became my job to protect them, but it is.
Zach is practicing hirikana next to me. His giant glasses don't look nearly as cute on him as they do on me.

3:12 p.m. - 2006-09-13

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next