mainsqueeze's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- level 17 So, I've been thinking a lot about the state of my life lately. I mean, I always do, that's all you poor few readers get to hear about, but I mean really thinking. Okay, so a few nights ago, Matt and I were talking and he cited my "ability to get shit done" as one of his top three favorite things about me, which was both flattering and funny--I definitely DO have the ability to get shit done, but I, um, I typically do not get shit done. Like, anything. I moved into my apartment three weeks ago and rather than unpacking, I have simply moved the copious amounts of unnecesary crap that I toted across the city from one plastic box to another, and then pushed those plastic boxes into the closet. This is my life, in a nutshell-- I refuse to throw anything away, I can't find the stuff I actually need, and I break my fucking back to lug it all around with me. Granny Shanny made an insanely astute observation a few weeks ago when she commented on the fact that I kind of lead two very separate and different lives-- one as a sucessful, hard-working, and efficient career woman and the other as a belching, farting, dick-joke-loving fool. Anyone who knows me will attest to the fact that when I am not acting like an eighty year old spinster, I am acting like a twelve year old boy, and when I am not acting like a twelve year old boy I am channelling John Goodman as King Ralph. At work, I am professional, unemotional, decisive, and well-liked. I don't know how I am all of these things, as I spend the bulk of my day playing Tetris with my office door locked or smoking on the patio, but I am. As I phrased it when talking to Matt last week, I am like a lion tamer, only instead of taming lions, I tame middle-aged professional men. Outside of my work, I'm kind of like a mentally retarded toddler in a toy store, in need of constant supervision and hand holding, in awe of everything I see, attracted to anything shiny. I would like to try to find a way to reconcile my two lives, although I am not sure that it is wise to strive to change anything as far as the work life goes, except for maybe cut out the video games. Sigh. As for right now, well, I have to do dishes. I mean, I should do dishes. 1:47 a.m. - 2007-10-14 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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