mainsqueeze's Diaryland Diary

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Sad Transmissions

When it gets late like this, and I can't sleep, I think of all of the people that I love. I wonder what they're doing.

I wonder if anybody is thinking about me.

I went with Zach to the Sprint office to drop off his phone payment awhile ago. On the way home, I found myself getting misty-eyed.

I was remembering the first time he told me that he loved me.

It was April of last year, and we were at his house in Wyoming. We were lying in his bed, not talking or kissing, just lying there together. We were chest to chest, and my head was against his shoulder. I remember thinking that I wanted to feel nothing but him, his skin, his breath, his heartbeat. I took off my t-shirt pressed myself against him. He smiled at me, didnt try to touch me, just smiled, and then he squeezed me really hard and whispered, "I love you." This sounds stupid, but when he said that, I felt like my heart had grown wings.

And here we are now, both searching for somebody new to fill the empty spaces in our lives.

How sad that sometimes love can't last.

2:10 a.m. - 2002-06-15

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