mainsqueeze's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- in a different life Oh and oh and oh. Who is there to trust, huh? What feels right is wrong and vice-versa, wondering if I'm confused or if things are supposed to be different. Tonight he said, "in a different life," and I said yeah, I know, really, huh, ha ha. And I don't necessarily think that's true, but I hold fast to the idea that there's somebody, somewhere. Somebody I won't hurt, somebody I won't need to crush to feel happy. Somebody who makes me hear the things I've been deaf to for twenty years, somebody who tells the truth, angry and cold, even when I've got my teeth bared at their throat. And I thought for sure this time, but I don't know what I'm doing. I ain't in control, not even a little. And a girl broke a promise to me. An important girl, one I used to love. I thought that would be forever, no doubt. But she's confused, she's skewed, aimlessly strolling down the same dark road as her Mother, as her sisters. Giving up something too valuable for description for a few paltry, pointless moments, sliding deep down like seawater, simmering away against her raw core. So answer me now: Is it wrong to demand honesty? Integrity? Is it wrong to ask somebody to put another's feelings ahead of their own hedonistic desires? And it is wrong to shove my clammy tongue down your living, healthy throat even though I'm only hoping this is real? Is it wrong to doubt? 2:34 a.m. - 2003-12-22 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||