mainsqueeze's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- mean mean thirst I'm ready and I'm scared, okay, sleepless at the moment, feel a little bit stoned, little bit drunk, in love with the world and I hate the world. Last night I could feel my hips for the first time, curves like, what? Hills? Mountains? Question marks? Heavy and smooth as cream? I could feel my hips and my shoulders and my spine, the smooth slope and the places that cracked like dry sticks when I was a teenager falling fast down the stairway. I could feel the skin on my feet pale and paper-thin my ankles and my calves, I could feel it all, all of me, the thing that I am on the outside. He said he likes my body and my body said it liked him back and his hands were everywhere and for a few minutes, an hour, I was back down on the ground, anchored and gently tugging on my own chain, wrapped snug in my flesh and bones and muscle. I am tired and the dream bugs are nibbling on my edges but I know that the world I made up for myself has nothing on the real one and all my messes are how I know that I am really and truly real and true and here with you all. 3:41 p.m. - 2007-03-25 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||